Out of anything I’ve ever filmed, this is definitely my proudest achievement. Not even the documentary, even though I am proud of it, but the fact I finally performed stand up. Live. To paying customers. There is so much more material that unfortunately ended up on the metaphorical cutting room floor, perhaps one day I’ll do a director’s cut with all the footage.
I have had a lot to correct for the Learning Outcomes but I have managed to get through them.
I know it sounds silly mentioning this but the stress has really been getting to me. My dad told me he found me sleepwalking during the night and my IBS has been really bad, I know that’s a bit too much information but I’m being as honest as I can be with this entry this week.
More good news in the form of my documentary being almost complete as I have to just edit a little bit for the ending, I feel ending it talking about my mum seems appropriate as she was in many ways my guinea pig for testing jokes out and she was with me when I made up what I feel was my first real and original joke… even if I didn’t realise at the time.
I just need to update my word press more and edit my showreel besides some small bits of paperwork I still need to do for work experience which, unfortunately, I have totally neglected.
My mood has improved and I have completed the essays. This has been one weight off my shoulders meaning I can focus on editing my documentary which has came on leaps and bounds since I came up with a basic framework for how I’d like to present it. I wasn’t happy with some back story then putting the full set in at the end. I decided to break up the set with bits of the journey leading to the performance. completed my rough cut which in all honestly I’m not a fan of but I will take on board the peer reviews given by the class and try to improve it.
I also finished the motion graphic part of my film logo, I just need to add sound to it, which is proving difficult as I cant find anything in my head to suit it
Thankfully the strikes are finally over and it’s back to work. I’m glad we’re back as I was finding it difficult to focus at home with personal situations. I’ve been trying to knuckle down and finish the learning outcomes but I have been more focused on getting my documentary done as like I’ve mentioned previously, editing is not one of my strong points and it has taken me longer to get done than I’d like to admit. Because of this, nearly all my other work has been neglected. Again I have no-one to blame but myself, but now we’re back to normal I should be able to get more work done. I have been struggling to end my documentary properly but I will need to come back to that once I finish the rest of my Learning Outcomes.
Also had another chat/meeting with Michael to discuss my word press and what needs to be sorted, but I haven’t really updated things much the past few weeks besides these journals, which I found out I’ve accidentally put in the wrong category.
If I’m honest I’m beginning to lose faith in myself, my mental health has taken a drop again and it’s affecting how I feel with my approach to the work. While I am getting work done, slowly or not, the thought of what’s left to do is worrying me but I just can’t feel anything within myself to focus on other stuff besides editing or essays.
Things that need to be finished: Showreel, work experience, Film Logo, documentary, Edits to my word press. Hopefully noting things down will help me get things done, and done right.
This week it was Tuesday and Wednesday for the Strike days so I was able to get help with using after effects on Thursday. Started work on my show reel as I completely forgot as I was so focused on my documentary. Starting to realise how little time we have left, and it’ll be even less if these strikes keep going. Thankfully my friend came through with drawing me another Buddha since the original one was more than likely copyrighted. 
I personally like how it has jeans and dog tags like I wear, giving it a touch of my own personality, which I didnt actually ask for but I feel it makes it unique to me.
I’m more on top of work than I have been, but I’m still not really as far ahead as i’d like to be. Even with losing sleep due to stressing out I still have a long way to go. I will be able to do this, I just need to keep focused.
It has been the first week of strikes where there have been two days, Tuesday and Thursday of strikes. Fortunately, it’s only Thursday that affects us but like I previously mentioned, that’s the week we have motion graphics and I’ve been struggling to get all the necessary components together as I found out from Michael, the Buddha design I chose, is probably copyrighted so I would need to find another one. Michael also very kindly, created a suggestion for how he would imagine a logo about Buddha. which is the picture I have included with this post. I have also asked a friend to help me by drawing me another Buddha for this but so far I’ve not heard anything back. I’ve put that on the back burner for now and started focusing on creative analysis LO2. For this, I have chosen Horror and Silent Comedy. Horror is by far my favourite genre so I’ve been enjoying the research into the origins of the genre, as well as the sub-genres. Silent comedy is not one of my strong points so I’ve been enjoying the research into the origins for that. Minus being behind with editing my documentary this week has been a slightly better week emotionally and I feel a bit more confident about my work.
Another week of strikes this time it was Wednesday. I spent the day trying to get LO1 done. I’ve been struggling a great deal trying to word these essays as all I have is notes I took during lessons so I decided for LO1 to use Toderov’s Theory of Equilibrium and the film I’ve chosen to discuss is Christopher Nolan’s The Dark Knight Rises. I’ve chosen this because I have seen it a few times and, to be honest since I’m a huge Batman fan, I’d like to look at the film from an academic and analytic point of view, and not through the eyes of a fan.
Michael discussed how much I need to catch up on if I’m wanting to pass the course. Like i said last week, I know only I can fix this and I’ve tried to put home life and personal problems on the back burner, but this has been difficult as my dad has really been struggling recently with his arthritis and it’s coming up to what would have been his and my mum’s 31st wedding anniversary so I’ve been unintentionally distracted by that.
Dates of strike
I have been spending this week typing up essays as we had Thursday off as one of the first strike days. This personally is a worrying thought for me as this is the day we have our motion graphics class and I have always struggled with editing animation and I would have preferred the time where I could get the help to this done. I have been spending my time just getting on with editing my documentary. This is taking a while as editing isn’t my strong point and I’m starting to get stressed with the amount of work still to get done. I know only I can fix this and I really want to do the best I can.
This is the first week back after the creative break. Unfortunately, this week is also the week the lecturer strikes began. I feel this is bittersweet as I understand why the lecturers are striking and fully support them, but if their bosses don’t listen and respond to these strikes, we are all going to be affected.
I have also been struggling to get the essays done, this is partly due to procrastination but also my mental health taking another drop, which I am trying to combat but it has unfortunately been a slow process. my documentary, however, has slowly been shaping up but I still feel I have a long way to go with it. Michael made a good point when talking to me in class, what’s the point of going out and performing if I don’t give the documentary justice by editing it properly? So I have been trying out some ideas with that as a distraction from everything going on.
This week we had the creative break which was an enjoyable experience where we got to work with the HNC film and the sound students.
It was interesting seeing how the sound files were edited together to make the music track. It was also interesting to work with different people over the course of the week and seeing how the track came from a simple idea and riff.
If there was one complaint I had was we had our own work to get done. I was, however, happy I was able to get the opportunity to get more footage I could use in my show reel if needed.
I now need to focus more on my own work so I can get it done on time, as I have fallen behind with getting it all done. Written work will be taking priority.
Bigger Than Buddha 